Inside Me

Jakarta, Indonesia
a sleepyhead. sometimes very loud, other times very quiet. i like to sing even though i sound like a crying pug.

2/07/2015

Am

[ ] I am a boy.
[x] I am a girl.
[x] I am shorter than 5’4.
[X] I think I’m ugly sometimes.
[X] I have many scars.
[ ] I tan easily.
[X] I wish my hair was a different color.
[x] I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color.
[ ] I have a tattoo.
[ ] I am self-conscious about my appearance.
[X] I wear glasses.
[ ] I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free
[x] I’ve been told I’m attractive by a complete stranger.
[ ] I have more than 2 piercings.
[ ] I have piercing in places besides my ears.
[ ] I have freckles.

Family/Home Life
[X] I’ve sworn at my parents.
[ ] I’ve run away from home.
[ ] I’ve been kicked out of the house.
[ ] I have a sibling less than one year old.
[x] I want to have kids someday.
[ ] I’ve lost a child.

School/Work
[x] I’m in school
[ ] I have a job
[x] I’ve fallen asleep at work/school.
[x] I almost always do/did my homework.
[ ] I’ve missed a week or more of school.
[ ] I’ve been on the Honor Roll within the last 2 years.
[ ] I failed more than 1 class last year.
[ ] I’ve stolen something from my job.

Embarrassment
[X] I’ve slipped out an “lol” in a spoken conversation.
[x] Disney movies still make me cry.
[ ] I’ve peed from laughing.
[x] I’ve snorted while laughing.
[x] I’ve laughed so hard I’ve cried.
[x] I’ve glued my hand to something.
[X] I’ve had my pants rip in public

Health
[ ] I was born with a disease/impairment
[ ] I’ve gotten stitches/staples.
[ ] I’ve broken a bone.
[ ] I’ve had my tonsils removed.
[x] I’ve sat in a doctor’s office/emergency room with a friend.
[ ] I’ve had my wisdom teeth removed.
[ ] I had a serious surgery.
[x] I’ve had chicken pox.
[ ] I’ve had measles

Traveling
[x] I’ve driven over 200 miles in one day
[x] I’ve been on a plane.
[ ] I’ve been to Canada.
[ ] I’ve been to Mexico
[ ] I’ve been to Niagara Falls.
[ ] I’ve been to Japan.
[ ] I’ve celebrated Mardi Gras in New Orleans.
[ ] I’ve been to Europe.
[ ] I’ve been to Africa.

Experiences
[x] I’ve gotten lost in my city.
[ ] I’ve seen a shooting star.
[ ] I’ve wished on a shooting star
[ ] I’ve seen a meteor shower.
[x] I’ve gone out in public in my pajamas.
[ ] I’ve pushed all the buttons on an elevator.
[ ] I’ve kicked a guy where it hurts.
[ ] I’ve been to a casino.
[ ] I’ve been skydiving.
[ ] I’ve gone skinny dipping.
[X] I’ve played spin the bottle.
[ ] I’ve drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour.
[ ] I’ve crashed a car.
[ ] I’ve been skiing.
[x] I’ve been in a play.
[ ] I’ve met someone in person from Myspace.
[ ] I’ve caught a snowflake on my tongue.
[ ] I’ve seen the Northern lights.
[x I’ve sat on a roof top at night.
[ ] I’ve played chicken.
[x] I’ve played a prank on someone
[x] I’ve ridden in a taxi.
[ ]I’ve seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
[x] I’ve eaten sushi.
[ ] I’ve been snowboarding.

Relationships
[ ] I’m single
[X] I’m in a relationship
[ ] I’m engaged.
[ ] I’m married.
[ ] I’ve gone on a blind date.
[ ] I’ve been the dumped more than the dumper.
[x] I miss someone right now.
[ ] I have a fear of abandonment.
[ ] I’ve gotten divorced.
[X] I’ve had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back.
[X] I’ve told someone I loved them when I didn’t.
[ ] I’ve told someone I didn’t love them when I did.
[x] I’ve kept something from a past relationship.
[ ] I’ve had a crush on someone of the same sex.
[ ] I’ve had a crush on a teacher.
[x] I am a cuddler.
[ ] I’ve been kissed in the rain.
[ ] I’ve hugged a stranger.
[ ] I have kissed a stranger.

Honesty/Crime
[x] I’ve done something I promised someone else I wouldn’t.
[x] I’ve done something I promised myself I wouldn’t.
[X] I’ve snuck out of my house.
[x] I have lied to my parents about where I am
[ ] I am keeping a secret from the world.
[x] I’ve cheated while playing a game.
[x] I’ve cheated on a test.
[x] I’ve run a red light.
[ ] I’ve been suspended from school.
[x] I’ve witnessed a crime.
[X] I’ve been in a fist fight.
[ ] I’ve been arrested.

Drugs/Alcohol
[x] I’ve consumed alcohol.
[ ] I regularly drink.
[ ] I’ve passed out from drinking.
[ ] I have passed out drunk at least once in the past 6 months.
[x] I’ve smoked weed
[ ] I’ve taken painkillers when I didn’t need them.
[ ] I’ve eaten shrooms.
[ ] I’ve popped E.
[ ] I’ve inhaled Nitrous.
[ ] I’ve done hard drugs.
[ ] I have cough drops when I’m not sick.
[X] I can swallow about 5 pills at a time no problem.
[  ] I have been diagnosed with clinical depression.
[ ] I have been diagnosed with one or more anxiety disorder.
[X] I shut others out when I’m depressed.
[ ] I take anti-depressants. (I should)
[ ] I have been anorexic or bulimic.
[X] I’ve slept an entire day when I didn’t need it.
[ ] I’ve hurt myself on purpose.
[x] I’ve woken up crying.

Death and Suicide
[X] I’m afraid of dying.
[ ] I hate funerals.
[X] I’ve seen someone dying.
[ ] Someone close to me has committed suicide.
[ ] I’ve planned my own suicide
[ ] I’ve attempted suicide.
[ ] I’ve written a eulogy for myself.

Materialism
[ ] I own over 5 rap CDs.
[ ] I own an iPod or MP3 player.
[ ] I have an unhealthy obsession with anime/manga.
[ ] I own multiple designer purses, costing over $100 a piece.
[ ] I own something from Hot Topic.
[ ] I own something from Pac Sun.
[X] I collect comic books.
[x] I own something from The Gap.
[ ] I own something I got on e-bay.
[ ] I own something from Abercrombie.

Random
[ ] I can sing well.
[ ] I’ve stolen a tray from a fast food restaurant.
[X] I open up to others easily.
[x] I watch the news.
[ ] I don’t kill bugs.
[ ] I hate hearing songs that sacrifice meaning for the sake of being able to rhyme.
[x] I curse regularly.
[x] I sing in the shower.
[ ] I am a morning person.
[ ] I paid for my cell phone ring tone.
[ ] I’m a snob about grammar.
[ ] I am a sports fanatic.
[ ] I twirl my hair
[ ] I have “x”s in my screen name.
[x] I love being neat.
[ ] I love Spam.
[] I’ve copied more than 30 CD’s in a day
[ ] I bake well.
[x] My favorite color is either white, yellow, pink, red or blue
[ ] I’ve worn pajamas to school.
[ ] I like Martha Stewart.
[ ] I know how to shoot a gun
[X] I am in love with love.
[ ] I am guilty of tYpInG lIkE tHiS.
[x] I laugh at my own jokes.
[ ] I eat fast food weekly.
[X] I believe in ghosts.
[X] I am online 24/7, even as an away message.
[X] I’ve not turned anything in and still got an A in a certain class.
[ ] I can’t sleep if there is a spider in the room.
[x] I am really ticklish.
[X] I love white chocolate
[ ] I bite my nails.
[x] I play video games.
[ ] I’m good at remembering names.
[ ] I’m good at remembering dates.
[ ] I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life

Hell

Tony Stark / Iron Man
[ ] You like booze
[ ] You are the life of the party
[X] You love gadgets
[X] You can be rather cocky
[X] Your favorite color is red or gold
[ ] You’re good with computers
[X] You use sarcasm a lot
[X] You love getting attention
[ ] You’re good at mechanics
[ ] You have issues with your parents
5/10

Dr. Bruce Banner / The Hulk
[ ] You’re good at science
[X] You can get very aggressive when ticked off
[ ] You like to be secluded most of the time
[X] You like wearing baggy clothes
[ ] You like to meditate
[ ] You like doing science experiments
[X] You try to avoid getting into fights
[ ] You like wearing purple things
[X] You’re clever
[ ] Your favorite color is green
4/10

Thor Odinson
[ ] You’re good with a hammer
[x] You like coffee
[x] You can eat a truckload of food and still be hungry
[x] You can be arrogant
[ ] You have long hair
[ ] You have an interest in astrology
[x] You can get sulky when things don’t go your way
[ ] You’re willing to take a fall for someone else
[ ] You like to dress up as fantasy characters
[ ] You don’t get on well with your sibling(s)
4/10

Steve Rogers / Captain America
[x] You like helping those in need in any way you can
[x] You hate bullies
[ ] You’re a great leader
[X] You’re a bit of a do-gooder
[X] One of your favorite color is red, white or blue
[ ] You like wearing things with stars on them
[ ] You strongly admire the army
[ ] You have a good throwing arm
[x] You like war films
[X] You’re good at running
6/10

Colonel Nick Fury
[ ] You like wearing long coats
[X] You’re good at organizing things
[ ] You’re good at being in the loop
[ ] You like guns
[x] You’re good at giving information to people
[X] You like giving solutions to peoples problems
[ ] You like eyepatches
[x] You work best as part of a team
[ ] You like beards
[x] You like wearing black things
5/10

Natasha Romanoff / Black Widow
[X] You like wearing tight clothes
[X] You can do martial arts
[x] You’re interested in the world of spies
[X] You have/had red hair
[X] You’re quite agile
[ ] People generally don’t know much about the real you
[x] You like to make yourself look good
[X] You can speak another language
[x] You’re good at taking orders
[ ] You were born in a different country to the one you are living in now
8/10

Clint Barton / Hawkeye
[ ] You’re very good at archery.
[X] You currently like/love someone on your team
[x] You like to wear purple and black
[ ] You’re very good at aiming
[ ] You’ve worked at the carnival
[ ] You like working in a team
[ ] You’re up for almost anything thrown at you
[ ] You’d be a top assassin if you ever took the job
[ ] You’re quiet
[x ] You tend to get along with people well
3/10

Loki Laufeyson
[ ] You want to be a great leader
[X] You want to prove something
[x] You’re the younger sibling
[ ] You’ve been/are overshadowed by a sibling(s)
[ ] You don’t get along so great with your sibling(s)
[x] You’re good at lying
[ ] You’re adopted
[x] You can be very clever
[X] You are able to manipulate people well
[ ] Your favorite color is green or gold
5/10

The

I love Barry M nail paints.
I sometimes think I eat too much.
The person I have feelings for is younger than me.
I can be quite stubborn sometimes.
I’m always too shy to tell someone if I like them.
I get bored easily.
I love those random conversations that make no sense.
I’m legally old enough to drink … but I don’t go out drinking too often.
I’m single.
I’m more of an evening person than a morning person.
I’ve read all of the Harry Potter books.
I’m not very flirty.
I spend a lot of time with my family.
People always seem to text me when I have no credit to text back.
Pasta is one of my favourite foods.
I worry a lot about what other people think of me.
My toenails are painted purple.
One of my friends is pregnant.
Chocolate always cheers me up when I’m feeling down.
I tend to get embarrassed and blush easily.
I’ve never been cheated on.
I prefer Facebook messages to comments.
I suffer from migraines.
I hardly ever drink coffee.
I feel insecure sometimes.
I like prawn cocktail flavour crisps.
I always make an effort to keep in touch with the people who matter to me.
Mariah Carey is one of my favourite singers…
…But I listen to all different types of music.
I miss someone right now.
I haven’t texted anyone in ages.
People can be quite protective of me sometimes.
I’ve never had unprotected sex.
I find it hard to lie to the people I care about.
I like the sensation of butterflies in the stomach.
Talking on the phone makes me feel awkward.
I’m easily amused.
Most of my friends are in relationships.
I usually keep my phone on silent.
I love to sing.
My best friend is pretty.
I’m hungry.
I hold back from saying what I think a lot of the time.
I love Bourbon biscuits.
Most people think I look younger than my actual age.
I wish I was taller.
My birthday is in April.
I’ve never smoked.
I don’t have casual sex.
I think Leona Lewis is pretty.
I don’t like to draw too much attention to myself.
I haven’t bought any new CDs for ages.
I prefer to wear my hair down.
I consider my friends to be more attractive than I am.
I hate guys who think they’re God’s gift to women.
When I was younger, I used to love pop groups like Steps, S Club 7 and Atomic Kitten.
I slept alone last night.
I use conditioner every time I wash my hair.
I was born in the 90’s.
I have blue eyes.
I don’t have a flat stomach …
… But I’m not worried about my weight.
My hair isn’t dyed.
I was obsessed with Pokémon when I was a kid.
I don’t like to bottle up my feelings …
… But I sometimes struggle to talk about them because I’m not sure what to say.
I sometimes miss the way things used to be.
I’ve had singing lessons.
I’m British.
I hardly ever wear white …
… Because I can’t seem to keep white things white, no matter how hard I try.
I’m straight.
One of my best friends is gay.
My hair isn’t straightened.
My friends think I have strange taste when it comes to guys.
I will be staying at home tonight.
I’m agnostic.
I’m quite romantic.
One of my friends is engaged.
I wear make-up … but I don’t use foundation.
I sometimes feel like I take things for granted.
The last person I hugged was a family member.
I like looking at old photos …
… Even if I look bad in them, just for old times sake.
I only dance when drunk.
I’m a forgiving person.
I listen to music by Evanescence.
I listened to music by Paramore.
I listened to music by 30 Seconds To Mars.
I don’t have a problem with being single …
… But sometimes I feel a little bit lonely.
I can’t whistle.
I dislike watching the news.
I haven’t had sex recently …
… And that doesn’t bother me.
My favourite type of chocolate is Galaxy.
I don’t wear shoes with high heels.
I feel embarrassed when I see photos of myself as a child.
My favourite soft drink contains caffeine.

What

Category One: Clothing
I wear Converse.
I wear plain black skate shoes.
I really love dresses.
I wear a lot of band t-shirts.
I wear a lot of black.
I like wearing skirts and dresses with Converse.
People at my school often copy my style.
I love jeans.
I dress the way I want to, I don’t care what anyone thinks about my style.
Wearing clothes I like gives me a lot more confidence.
I don’t really look to anyone else for style ideas.

Category Two: General Appearance
Something about my appearance is very unique and distinct.
I have more than one birth mark.
I have very tanned skin.
& I tan extremely easily in the summer.
I am skinny.
But I have curves.
I wear glasses.
I have my father’s eyes.
My self-esteem has been getting much better.
People have told me straight up that they are jealous of my body - & it feels good to get compliments like that.
I don’t spend a lot of time getting ready - I basically look the way I do when I wake up.

Category Three: Annoyances
I hate when people are overly cocky and arrogant.
I hate when people make assumptions - they’re normally totally off.
When I’m standing in line at a cash or something, I hate when people stand practically on top of me. It doesn’t make the line move any faster!
I strongly dislike when I get excess lotion or water in between my fingers, and I don’t really understand why.
If someone pisses me off enough, I’m not shy to tell them off.
If someone is asked to stop doing something more than once, I feel it’s okay to start yelling at them.
I hate hypocrites - but I can be a hypocrite myself sometimes.
I hate people who act like know-it-alls.
& I hate it even more when it’s a subject I know more about than them.
I absolutely hate when people try to drag me into their pathetic drama.
My number one pet peeve is one someone has too many pet peeves.

Category Four: Surveys
I find it stupid when people take the tags off surveys, but survey makers who go as far as making a “hate list” for all those who do it are just assholes themselves.
I think I may have a serious addiction to surveys… Oh well!
There are many people on Xanga I would like to meet in real life!
& There are a few people on Xanga that I’d like to yell at.
I seriously wonder why Xanga isn’t as popular as Facebook when it’s so much better than Facebook.
If you’re going to insult me directly more than once while taking a survey I made, then don’t even bother taking my survey.
& In a way I’m a hypocrite for saying that, because if there’s no tag on the survey, then I will call the survey maker an idiot and whatnot, if I seriously feel they are and if I’m in that bad of a mood.
I’d be a millionaire if I got paid to do this!
I wish I had a laptop with wifi so that I could sit outside and do surveys when I have nothing better to do.
Why do survey makers insist on having a certain number of comments and subscribers before they make another survey? This is for fun, it isn’t a business, and you aren’t making money off of it, so why are you being so anal about communication with your survey-takers?
I don’t see the point in lying on surveys. Why take them if you aren’t going to tell the truth?

Category Five: Things I Seriously Love
Coffee, and caffeine in general.
The show Pawn Stars.
Feeling good about myself.
Encouraging other people to stay positive and be strong.
Tattoos and piercings.
Anthropology, sociology, and psychology.
Making and taking surveys.
Dreadlocks.
Rain and thunderstorms.
Music, of course.
Random, interesting facts.

Category Six: Music
I can play piano.
I can play bass.
I can sort of play guitar.
I listen to music every day.
I own at least three instruments.
I still buy CDs.
I really want to learn to play drums.
I wouldn’t mind learning to play the violin as well.
Practically everyone in my family can play some sort of instrument.
I used to take dance lessons.

Category Seven: Photography
I own a FujiFilm camera.
I take walks so I can take pictures.
I have a folder on my computer of pictures I’ve taken.
I love taking pictures of fireworks.
I also love taking pictures of nature.
One of my favorite settings on my camera is macro.
I have a blink detector on my camera.
My camera takes amazing, bright, vivid photos.
I want to make a photo album of pictures that I’ve taken.
I wouldn’t mind being a photographer.
I don’t know what I would do without my camera.

Category Eight: Relationships & Friendships
I have serious trouble keeping lasting friendships.
But I have no trouble keeping a lasting romantic relationship.
& Those two don’t directly relate to each other - I don’t ditch my friends for my partner, ever.
I have been in a relationship for almost two and a half years.
& It is my first relationship.
I have only ever kissed one person.
My partner and I have been in a band together.
In my opinion, friends are for socializing, not relying on for rough times.
I love going out with friends.
I have been in a band with all my best friends before.
I have been verbally and psychologically abused by friends before.
I have punched one of my friends in the face.